De-De's Mission
I’m Not Here to Sell You Anything. I’m Here Because I’ve Been You.
My mission is simple: I want every woman trapped in a narcissistic relationship to know she’s not crazy, she’s not alone, and she CAN get out.
I’m not a therapist. I’m not a coach. I’m a woman who survived 22 years of emotional abuse, manipulation, and gaslighting, and lived to tell the story with her sense of humor still intact.
I wrote my book, I shared my story, and I showed up here because the woman I was ten years ago needed someone like me. She needed someone to look her in the eye and say: “It’s not you. It’s him. And you’re going to be okay.”
That’s what I’m here to do.
De-De's Story
The Short Version: I’m Tiny, I’m Loud, and I Survived a Monster.
Why I Shared the Hardest Story I’ve Ever Lived
I grew up in rural Maine with my twin sister. We didn’t have much. What we did have was chaos—a childhood marked by poverty, instability, and abuse that I wouldn’t fully understand until decades later.
By my late twenties, I’d found my way into the adult entertainment industry, not because I dreamed of it, but because I was a single mom who needed to survive. I’m not ashamed of it. It kept a roof over my son’s head and food on the table. I filed my taxes, I set my boundaries, and I did what I had to do.
Then I met him.
He was wealthy, charming, and seemed like everything I’d been missing. What started as a relationship turned into 22 years of control, manipulation, and emotional destruction. He monitored my weight. He controlled my meals. He gave me a 5.3-carat ring without ever actually asking me to marry him. From the outside, I had “the life.” From the inside, I was starving, literally and emotionally.
I lost 50 pounds. I fainted. I ended up in a mental hospital. And still, I stayed, because that’s what trauma bonding does. It makes you believe the cage is home.
But I got out.
Today, I’m rebuilding. I’m studying to become a nurse because I want to spend the rest of my life helping people heal, the way I’m learning to heal myself. I’m the proudest mom and the best auntie you’ll ever meet. I’m a die-hard New England Patriots fan who will talk football with anyone, anywhere, anytime.
And I wrote a book called The Ring That Changed Nothing because my story deserves to be told, and because somewhere out there, a woman needs to hear it.
I’m De-De. I’m petite in frame but my presence is larger than life. I’m goofy, I’m funny, I’m a straight shooter, and I don’t sugarcoat anything. I shine in the dark. And I’m just getting started.
“I would love for you to now read the whole story.”
~De-De
Why Interview De-De
She’s Raw. She’s Real. And Your Audience Will Never Forget Her.
De-De isn’t your typical abuse survivor interview. She’s not somber. She’s not scripted. She’s a five-foot firecracker who will make your audience laugh, cry, and feel seen, all in the same conversation.
Her story spans childhood trauma, survival, a 22-year narcissistic relationship, and a comeback that’s still being written. She speaks with an honesty that cuts through the noise and a humor that makes even the heaviest topics feel human.
If your audience includes women who have experienced toxic relationships, emotional abuse, or narcissistic manipulation, or anyone who loves someone who has, De-De is the guest they need to hear.
What De-De Talks About
To follow are a few key topics De-De speaks about—though she also customizes her talks to fit your audience's needs and the conversation you want to spark.
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When Survival Looks Like Love: How early trauma shapes our definition of love and why toxic relationships can feel familiar
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The Cost of Endurance: Abuse Without Bruises: Emotional and psychological abuse, why it's so hard to recognize from the inside
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Reclaiming Self Later in Life: Rebuilding self-trust, boundaries, and identity in midlife
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Gaslighting, Manipulation, and Control: What emotional abuse actually looks like day to day
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The connection between childhood trauma and adult relationship patterns
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Finding humor and resilience in the darkest chapters of your life
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Why it's never too late to choose yourself
Whether you’re a survivor who wants to say “me too,” a podcaster who wants to book De-De, or someone who just needs to know they’re not alone, reach out now!
"You have taken everything they purportedly took from you and transformed it into strength and wisdom."
~De-De